


The Instagram Incident

by minty_stripes



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-22
Updated: 2015-05-22
Packaged: 2018-03-31 15:56:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3984016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minty_stripes/pseuds/minty_stripes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky gets an instagram, anonymous, cute, family-friendly pictures of the Avengers.  Steve accidentally posts something else.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Instagram Incident

                Bucky takes to social networking like a fish to water.  Steve wakes up early one morning to Bucky’s phone in his face, the quiet click of the camera as he snaps a picture of Steve’s sleeping face before rolling over in bed.  Steve groans, shuffling across the bed to wrap his arms around Bucky’s waist and buries his face in his shoulder.

“What’re you doing?”

“Nat introduced me to Instagram.  The world needs more of your face in it.”  Steve lets out a breath across Bucky’s skin and snuggles into him, drifting back to sleep.  Bucky grins to himself, typing away on his phone before posting the picture.  Even though it’s 3am, Natasha likes the photo in seconds and comments _he’s cuter when he isn’t bossing us around :P_ Bucky grins to himself and turns his phone off, snuggling back into Steve’s warm embrace and drops into sleep.

~~~

                There are over ten thousand likes and hundreds of comments on the photo in the morning.  Clint congratulates Bucky on his internet fame over a mug of the sludge he calls coffee, and Bucky responds by stealing the rest of the coffee pot.  Clint tries to grab it back, but Natasha grabs him around the waist and casually pulls him onto her lap.  Bucky laughs and snaps a picture of Natasha’s smirk and Clint’s indignant scowl.

“Don’t you dare post that Barnes!” Clint threatens.  Natasha wraps herself tighter around him, holding him in the chair with her and plants a kiss on his cheek.  Bucky snaps another picture.

“Post those together James, tag us in them too.” Natasha adds.  Bucky grins, putting both pictures together in a collage app and posting it to Instagram with the caption _assassins in love_.  Natasha’s phone is out of her back pocket in a second and she’s liked the photo and reposted it on the Avengers official page with the caption _team building in the Tower._   Clint gives up struggling and lets Natasha latch onto him more securely, holding him to her chest and happily kissing the back of his neck.

“You two are disgusting.” Bucky complains.  Clint kicks Bucky in the side gently, and Bucky makes a face at him while drinking from Clint’s coffee pot.

“Man that’s my coffee!” Clint complains.  Bucky shrugs and walks off.  Steve shows up a few minutes later, scrubbing at his eyes tiredly and picks the coffee pot out of Bucky’s hands with a kiss and a small mutter of thanks.

“Your face got quite a lot of attention on Instagram this morning Steve.” Steve blearily looks over to Natasha, a confused frown on his face.

“Huh?”

“James’ Instagram account, your sleeping face was his first post, he’s getting rather popular.”  Steve turns to Bucky, who’s rooting through the fridge for breakfast.  Bucky makes eye contact for a moment before shrugging.

“It’s all anonymous.  I don’t post pictures of myself, no one knows I’m still alive, just pictures of the team in everyday life.”  Steve shrugs.

“PR’s gonna try to shut that down.” Bucky nods, tossing his phone to Steve, it’s open to a message from PR asking him to shut the account down.

“I think it’ll make you guys more likeable.  Show the public the real people behind the uniforms.”  Natasha nods in agreement.

“It’ll be good for us, instead of just the official account of mostly posed photos and still shots from battles caught on street cameras.  They need to know we’re human too, it’ll help them from getting so mad when we bust up the city to keep them safe.”

“Damn civilians, right?” Clint jokes with a smile.  Natasha shushes him and he steals a kiss.  She gives him a warning look but he only smiles wider.  Steve takes a selfie on Bucky’s phone, holding up the pot of coffee and grinning, hair sticking up in all directions: _good morning New York, featuring Captain America’s bedhead and Hawkeye’s caffeine sludge!_   Bucky grins, crossing the kitchen to rest his hands on Steve’s waist and lean in to kiss him.  Steve snaps another selfie of them and Bucky pulls away laughing.

“What’s that one for?”

“Me.” Steve replies with a grin, texting the picture to himself and passing the phone back to Bucky.  Bucky kisses him again, distracting him while he steals the coffee pot back.

“Disgusting.” Clint and Natasha mutter together.

~~~

                The picture of Steve brushing his teeth with a towel wrapped around his waist gets a lot of attention.  A _lot_ of attention.

“The Instagram account StarsAndStars has been generating a lot of internet traffic this week, having shown up two weeks ago with no explanation, nothing in the bio, and no pictures of the person behind the account.  The account, however, is filled with pictures of what appears to be everyday life with the Avengers team, and more specifically, pictures of Captain America in a domestic setting.  Speculation has been swirling around the account since its creation, with the first post that of a sleeping Captain America, and the most recent post this morning of Captain America, wearing nothing but a towel, sleepily brushing his teeth.  Could this account belong to an unknown significant other of Captain America?  After the events in Washington, the Captain has been seen in the company of the Black Widow often, though this same account has posted numerous pictures of the Black Widow and Hawkeye in positions suggestive of a romantic relationship-”

“Suggestive?  I’m offended!” Natasha comments.  The team’s sitting together in the communal living room watching the news.  Natasha holds out her hand and Bucky passes over his phone.  She opens Instagram and grabs Clint, kissing him deeply and snapping a picture.  She pulls away to type up a caption and Clint sits next to her on the couch, a dazed expression on his face.  She posts the photo and on the screen, someone ducks into the shot to whisper something to the anchor, who picks her phone up from the desk.

“Just posted to the same account, a picture of Black Widow and Hawkeye kissing, the caption reads: ‘suggestive? I own this ass’.” The anchor looks back up to the camera, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.  “It would appear that the Avengers are watching the show, and Hawkeye and Black Widow don’t take too kindly to any denial of their relationship.”  Bucky snaps a quick picture of the team on the couch, tangled together and passing around a box of rice krispies, he captions it: _morning news with the crew._

~~~

                Steve wakes up with a mouthful of Bucky’s hair, and pulls away, pulling brown curls out of his mouth with a groan.  Bucky wakes up, turning around to watch Steve, who still has a mouthful of Bucky’s hair.  Bucky grins and shifts carefully to snap a picture on his phone without disturbing Steve.  He posts it immediately, captioned: _probs of a long-haired partner, waking up like this,_ and then pulls his hair into a messy bun and kisses Steve on the corner of his mouth.

“You sure you don’t want a haircut Buck?  Your hair’s nearly as long as Thor’s.”  Bucky grins, kissing Steve again.

“I like it like this, not complaining are you?”  Steve shakes his head, tangling his fingers in the stray strands of Bucky’s hair and pulling him close for a slow, open-mouthed kiss.

“No it’s great Buck.” Bucky grins, kissing Steve back.

“You just like that you’ve got something to hold onto when you’re riding me.”  Steve flushes bright red, muttering something under his breath as Bucky laughs and pulls him in for kiss after kiss.

“Totally uncalled for Buck…”

“Mmhm, like anyone believes that.”

“Jerk.”

“Punk, ah.” Bucky lets out a small moan as Steve nips at his bottom lip.

“You gonna make good on that accusation Barnes?”  Bucky grins, a challenge in his eye.

“Ride hard.” Bucky tells him, his best shit-eating grin stretching across his face.  Steve groans.

“Should’ve never watched Lord of the Rings with you.”

“Still can’t believe how amazing those movies were, ah fuck.” Steve’s straddling Bucky now, rolling his hips lazily down against Bucky’s, pulling breathless moans from them both.

“Lord of the Rings getting you going then?”  Bucky laughs, pulling Steve down and breathing heavily into his open mouth.

“That’s all you babe.” Steve rolls his eyes and leans in to kiss Bucky, rocking against him and swallowing down his moans.

~~~

                Darcy’s sitting on the kitchen counter waiting while Clint makes coffee.  She’s got an empty mug in her hand and there’s a girl at her feet pulling on a thread from her socks while Darcy taps her in the head every few minutes.  Bucky snaps a picture almost out of reflex while he picks up his own mug and sidles up next to Darcy, waiting for coffee, caption: _superheroes need the most caffeine, morning coffee line is worse than any supervillain._

“Bunch of vultures god!” Clint complains as he holds the finished product close to his chest in an attempt to shield it from the three people watching him carefully.

“Just hand it over Hawkguy.” The girl on the floor suggests, her tone careful and vaguely threatening.  Clint shakes his head.

“Fuck off Kate.  You steal my coffee when I’m home and you’re not getting it when I’m here too.”  Darcy manages to hook her toes in the hem of Clint’s shirt and hold him in place.

“Share.  This is a communal living space.  You _have_ to share Barton.” Darcy demands.  Clint shakes his head, and catches Bucky’s eye.  In the time it takes Darcy and Kate to blink, Clint’s passed the pot to Bucky and Natasha’s neatly plucked it out of his hands, seemingly coming out of nowhere.

“What just happened?” Kate asks, looking up at the group gathered in the kitchen.  Natasha is sauntering off happily, taking small sips from the pot of coffee as she makes her way to the balcony.

“An assassin just stole our coffee.” Darcy breathes.  She grins.  “That is _so cool_!” Bucky watched Natasha over his shoulder.

“Two can play at that game right Barnes?” Clint asks, gently elbowing Bucky in the side.  Bucky stands up a little straighter and is gone in the space of a blink.

“Who the hell is that?” Kate asks as she finally stands up and goes in search of another coffee pot.

“New guy on the team, though technically he’s older than all of us, Steve included.”  Darcy’s watching the balcony, where Bucky is drinking as much coffee as he can while Natasha attempts to get it back from him.  Like Clint said, two can play at the Russian assassin game.

“Older than Captain America himself?”  Clint nods along to Darcy, refilling the coffee filter and jamming in the replacement pot Kate found.

“Only by a year though.  You remember Sergeant Barnes, best sniper in the history of the US Army?” Kate’s eyes widen in awe and she looks over to the balcony, where Natasha and Bucky seem to have reached an agreement and are leaning on the balcony railing, passing the coffee pot between them.  Clint snaps a picture and sends it to Steve without having to think about it.

“That’s Sergeant James Buchanan ‘Bucky’ Barnes, best sniper in the history of the US Army, sidekick to Captain America, and the only Howling Commando to die in combat?” Clint shrugs.

“Well he obviously didn’t die…..”

“Clint!  How long has he been here?”  Again, Clint shrugs.

“How did he survive?” Darcy asks, finally more interested in something other than the coffee slowly brewing.  Out on the balcony, Bucky and Natasha have finished off the first pot of coffee and Clint suspects they’re plotting to steal the next one.  He watches them carefully.

“You know the Winter Soldier?”  Darcy nods.

“Yeah that SHIELD intel was all over the net.  Managed to pull most of it onto an external harddrive before it got erased from the net too.  Legendary assassin, KGB, active for the last fifty years, no one sees him and lives so he’s really just a rumor.” Darcy rattles off the facts like she’s memorized them.  She probably has.

“That’s who fought the Captain in Washington.” Kate adds. Clint nods and tilts his head in Bucky’s direction.  Darcy forces down a gasp and it takes Kate a second more until her mouth is hanging open too.

“The world’s most legendary and deadly assassin stole my morning coffee?  Is that what you’re telling me?” Darcy is either terrified or incredibly excited, and Clint can’t tell which is which; he just nods slowly.

“That’s so fucking awesome!”

~~~

                It happens a week later.  Until now, the Instagram account starsandstars has been filled with pictures of the team in varying states of relaxation, sitting around and watching movies, sharing pancakes at Sam’s house when they take trips to spend a weekend in DC, in the pool in Avenger’s tower, passed out in communal spaces after a mission, it’s been good until now.

“Now I’d like to again warn the audiences that the picture is very explicit, and we will only be showing an edited version on the show, but early this morning the Instagram account starsandstars, which has been gaining fame over the last few weeks for its’ photos of the Avengers team in a family setting, posted an incredibly explicit photo of none other than Captain America in the middle of having sex with another man.”

“Fucking hell!” Bucky shouts, throwing the remote across the room.  Steve is sitting next to him on the couch, beet red, having accidentally posted the photo that morning when he thought he was sending it to his own phone.  To be fair, he’d spent the last two hours having amazing sex with Bucky, and at one point demanded Bucky take a picture of them to save for himself.  Bucky’d laughed, taken the picture, and made a joke about setting up a video camera next time.  Steve, in his exhausted and happily-fucked-out state, had clicked ‘post to instagram’ instead of ‘send in new message’ in the photos options.  He’d realized it a minute later when Natasha called them and alerted them to the mistake, but it was too late, too many people had seen it and taken a screenshot of the picture.

“We’re so dead.” Steve is muttering under his breath.  Bucky snorts a short laugh, and kisses Steve on the cheek.

“We’ve survived death before.”  Steve sighs and kisses Bucky on the corner of his mouth, a fond smile on his lips.

“Trust you to turn something like this into a stupidly sweet moment.” Bucky shrugs.

“It’s a nice shot of you riding dick what can I say?”  Steve laughs loudly, wrapping an arm around Bucky’s shoulder and cuddling into his side.  He presses a kiss to the underside of Bucky’s jaw.

“I love you Buck.”

“Love you too punk.”

“Jerk.”

~~~

“I understand that a number of you have seen that picture from yesterday,” Awkward laughs roll through the crowd of reporters, and Steve grins nervously while shrugging.  “Yeah, it was pretty bad, but a lot of the things that the public have gotten from this are that yeah that Instagram is run by the person I’m dating, I’m definitely getting laid, and I’m openly bisexual.”  Reporters start shouting their questions and cameras begin to flash.  Steve waves them all down.  “That’s all I’ve got to say on the matter, have a nice day.” He leaves the podium quickly, and Bucky is waiting for him in their apartment, lying in bed and watching the news coverage of his press conference.

“Well done doll.”

“Jerk.”

“Punk.”  Bucky grins, pulling Steve in for a kiss and snapping a picture.  He posts it to Instagram immediately: _guess we’re out, oops!_

“You’re ridiculous.” Steve comments with a grin.  Bucky kisses him again.

“Yeah, ridiculously hot.”  Steve rolls his eyes, kissing Bucky again.  There’s a knock on the door and Bucky groans, climbing off of Steve to answer the door.

“What?”

“Hiya James.” Natasha greets him with a small smile.  Bucky rolls his eyes and opens the door wider for her.  Natasha gives him a quick kiss on the cheek and sits down on the couch next to Steve.  He rests his head on her shoulder while Bucky sits down on her other side.

“So Rogers, I knew you could ride a motorcycle but I didn’t realize how well you could ride James.”  Steve flushes bright red and Bucky nearly chokes laughing, and Natasha has a little self-satisfied grin on her face.  Bucky leans across Natasha to give Steve a kiss, and she snaps a picture for the official Avengers Instagram: _horribly cute, I might be sick._

**Author's Note:**

> so I know it's been forever since I've updated Degrees of Separation, but I've dug myself into a hole on that one and I'm working my way out. In the meantime, I'm going to keep writing one-shots and one-shot AUs.


End file.
